God only knows

I had a suitably religious day yesterday, when a friend took me to his local church in South London. I was a little wary of going because I thought it would either be a happy-clappy-born-again church, or just plain boring. However, any church with a pine dining table complete with tablecloth for an altar, a cabinet full of Christian, Hindu, Buddhist and Islamic religious artifacts, and a hand-painted coffee-coloured Jesus on the wall had to be all right.

My positive feelings were confirmed when, in the middle of the Eucharist, the priest asked everyone to recite the Lord's Prayer in their own language and I heard a babble of Chinese, Tamil, Spanish, French, English and more fill the hall. It was simply beautiful. I later learned that 20 different nationalities are represented there. One of the priests (there are four, including one woman) even cooked us all lunch.

The religious theme continued tonight when I saw Saved! - a typical teen satire with an evangelical twist. Mary (Jena Malone) is the God-fearing Christian school girl whose mission to infiltrate the popular clique, the Christian Jewels (headed up by born again bitch Mandy Moore) backfires spectacularly when she becomes pregnant by her gay boyfriend. Having failed so miserably in her role as the Good Girl, she falls in with the school misfits, headed by novelty Jew Cassandra (played by Susan Sarandon's daughter) and world-weary, sarcastic, wheelchair-bound Roland (impressively played by Macauly Culkin). Through them she learns the "true" message of Christianity: love thy neighbour, even if that neighbour is gay, a Jew or an unwed teenage mother.

The movie has been quite rightly panned by the critics. What begins as a razor-sharped satire of the reactionary Christian right, ends - on prom night, no less - with a moralising, sentimental and ultimately saccharine message of universal love. But it made me reflect again on my own experiences and I can understand the attraction of hardcore Christianity.

For two years at the end of my teens, I was seduced by evangelical Christianity. As a teenager, trying to find my place in the world and yearning to fit in, I embraced the rigidity of a religion that needed nothing from me but my total acceptance. Belonging to an evangelical church gave me the sense of belonging and community I had never felt before. And after years of thinking too much, it was a relief not to have to anymore: my thinking was done for me and I simply had to agree.

Eventually, of course, it all got too stifling. But for a time, it was absolute heaven.

Reviews:
+ Roger Ebert. Positive.
+ Slant. Negative.

Other links today:
+ Google censorship. "I went to Google Images to search for it. 'Abu Ghraib' brought up only photos of the outside of the prison. Not a single photo from the scandal. Next I searched for 'Lynndie England', not a single picture. Next I decided to look for 'Charles Graner' her boyfriend who was also prominently features in the pictures, nothing." I tried it. Even with Safe Search Off, it's true: nada! Update: Google's response.

+ The decline of brands. "Sure, there are more brands than ever. But they're taking a beating - or, even worse, being ignored. Who's to blame? A new breed of hyperinformed superconsumers. (That's right - you!)."

+ Rhyme without reason. "The farmer's wife cuts the tails of three blind mice. Jack tumbles down a hill and suffers a skull fracture. What is the real scheme in these rhymes?"