Mid-week rambles

• I'm writing this bleary eyed at 5.30am in the morning. Have been up for a few hours. I couldn't sleep, I still can't sleep, and I have a breakfast meeting and three proposals to write today. How am I going to keep my eyes open today?
  
  
• Gorgonzola, broccoli and pasta tonight for dinner - I'm already dreaming of it.
  
  
• All week, our tummies have been filled with juicy peaches, blackberries, blueberries, strawberries, pineapples and watermelon.
  
  
• Be still, and know that I am God. Still my favourite mantra in the middle of a hectic day, even though I don't care for the rest of the psalm.
  
  
• It's my birthday on Friday!
  
  
• A post I read recently made me think about manifesting for a good relationship. I never had the patience to do this when I was sans M and single, but a friend of mine years ago, who had been single for several years, found a picture of her ideal relationship and meditated regularly on the image. She also made a list of all the qualities she wanted in a partner and meditated on that too. After a short time, that image of her ideal relationship materialised for her in the shape of the man who is now her now husband.
  
  
• I usually try and make the effort to take a packed lunch into work each day, but this and last week I've been enjoying some lovely lunches from Crussh - summer porridge with berry compote, pomegranate chicken and spiced brown rice salad with a yoghurt and mint dressing, sweet pepper and Moroccan chicken salad with sun-dried tomatoes and basil, hemp and sunflower seed organic yoghurt... Today I may try one of their super-healthy-sounding health pots - perhaps beetroot, chickpeas and fresh coriander, or perhaps organic grated carrot, pumpkin seeds, sultanas and cranberries in a flaxseed oil and mustard dressing.
  
  
• My presentation to clients yesterday went extremely well. They work in the luxury end of the food industry and eat in Michelin-starred restaurants virtually every day, and yet they said that when they go out for pleasure it is to small, independent, ethnic restaurants such as Indian or Thai. One of the guys said he likes nothing better than eating tinned Heinz spaghetti hoops for dinner after a day of eating fancy food! Luckily, they seemed to enjoy my choice of dinner venue - Sardinian restaurant Sardo. For starters, I ate carpaccio di manzo - finely sliced fillets of beef marinated in extra virgin olive oil, lemon and fresh herbs, served with rocket leaves and pecorino shavings. For mains, I ate tonno alla griglia - grilled fresh tuna steak served with rucola and tomatoes. And my dessert was an amaretto sponge cake with nougat ice cream.
  
  It was wonderful meeting people as crazy about food as I me. They too plan their holidays around what they like - or would like - to eat!
  
  
• I finally got my parents' cine 8 reels of childhood home movie footage converted to DVD. The transfer cost a whopping £200 for just 1 hour and 25 minutes but it's for their 40th wedding anniversary on the 15th of August, so it's completely worth it. M has been having fun watching his wife as a 1 year old and it's been wonderful for me to see how glamourous my parents and their Indian friends looked all those years ago - having dinner parties and going on day trips to the seaside or to the country. It strikes me that footage of middle class Indian life in 60s and 70s Britain must be so rare.

Midweek rambles

- Completely shaken up by a very aggressive neighbour - the kind of man who cannot have a logical, adult conversation but has to shout boosted by alcohol (including at his wife).

- Work has been a much steadier pace this week which has been a pleasant surprise. Have been able to leave on time each day so far, though I still start early.

- I'm discovering that wireless is not so liberating afterall. I've had to ask M not to let me have his phone all the time cause I'm getting addicted to surfing the net on it all over the house. I need to stick to a laptop connected to a single location with wires.

- Choosing our hotels and flights to Tokyo and Kyoto. Poring over guidebooks and back issues of Wallpaper* and travel magazines and planning all the things we want to see and do. Dreaming of all things Japanese.

- Contrary to appearances, I am an inverterate snob. So when I was tagged by Broom, I jumped at the chance to vent on those I judge. Here goes, you may not like me after this:

• Primark girls - you look cheap, perhaps you are cheap, why do you want to look like everyone else, dare to be an individual! (Okay, in venting I'm completely overlooking the fact that I like wandering around Oasis, The Gap and Top Shop once in a while. But this is a vent, so who cares.)
  
• Addicts begging for money beneath ATMs - I'm not funding your habit, go away cause you're spoiling it for those genuinely in need.
• Out-of-towners who eat in Garfunkels or Angus Steakhouse - this is one of the greatest cities in the world. You come here and then can't be bothered to take advantage of the sheer variety of food. You may as well have stayed in the suburbs.
  
• Tourists dawdling in the middle of the street - okay, I do the same in your country, but come on I'm late for work!
• Language students pestering me with their leaflets - I may have brown skin but please do not presume I need help speaking English - I speak it better than most English people anyway. (Did I mention I'm a Leo with a big ego?)
  
• People in cheap purple nylon clothes pestering me to take their free London newspapers - I know you're struggling to make a living like the rest of us but please don't take up so much room on the pavement. Besides, why would I want to assist you in the cutting down of our trees and adding to the landfill?
• Harry Potter kidults - please grow up, you look silly in a suit reading it on the Tube. How old are you - 35? At least try and hide your addiction or at the very least read the adult cover version. (Sorry all the people I know who are Potters - I'm just venting, just for the purposes of this post! Who am I to judge - I enjoy chick lit now and again.)
  
• Men who wear wet gel in their hair to work - you're men not boys.
• Men whose suit trousers don't quite reach the tops of their shoes - you're men not boys.
• Suited men who forget to polish their shoes - why would I employ you if you cut corners and pay no attention to detail?
• Whingers and whiners and naggers and ditherers - just get on with it for f's sake!
• People who moan about living in London and sit watching TV or getting drunk in bars every free time they get - either move out or make the most of where you live but stop complaining.
• Judgmental, small-minded, snobby people - whoops, I'd better move along guiltily!

- So far this week we've cooked and eaten chicken fajitas, beef and leek noodle soup, cheesy scrambled eggs with leeks and a balsamic tomato salad, curried chickpeas and spinach with apricots.

- Have been engrossed in Paul Auster's The Brooklyn Follies - so much more expansive than his previous novels, with a fabulously realistic set of characters and an intense sense of location. I'm trying to draw out the last few pages because I can't bear for it to end. His best book yet.

- Losing myself in a series of in-the-moment activities - folding laundry, washing dishes, wiping surfaces, chopping vegetables. Who needs to sit in zazen.

Super

The things that have been thrilling and soothing me this week / My smooth as silk Nicole Farhi ti-shirt / Super sweet Alfonso mangoes / Super sexy and soulful Leonard Cohen's Various Positions album / Cucumber and houmous pitta sandwiches for lunch / My husband's smothering kisses and all-enveloping hugs / The sunshine when it finally decides to peek through the black clouds / The cold rain on my bare arms catching me unaware / The hearty juiciness of a 1996 bottle of Tempranillo / Super fattening homemade chicken and cheese fajita and guacamole / Super fattening spaghetti with bacon and butter beans / Reading lyrical evocations of Bengali life in India and in the US and reflecting on my own experiences of growing up Asian in Britain / A yummy chocolate mousse cake for a colleague's birthday / Indian School on BBC 4 reminding me of my own days living and teaching at a boarding school in Dehra Dun / A new pair of wedge heel shoes from Dune / Walking through the din of central London and still being fully at peace within my own space / Butter soft Turkish delight and gooey nougat from a colleague / Watching sloth bears eat watermelons and grapes in London Zoo at my husband's department party / The fact that today's Thursday and the weekend is just two days away!

Black sausages, pickled pears and wodka

We finally made it to Wodka tonight - the Polish restaurant in Kensington. Just like the Baltic - its sister restaurant - the food was comfort food of the highest order. Unlike the Baltic, the atmosphere was hushed, candlelit and intimate. I love both restaurants for different reasons. For starters, I had black sausage with pickled red cabbage and pear puree. M had herring blinis.

I'm one of the few people I know who adores black pudding and when people ask me what would I order as a last ever meal I more often than not reply, habas con morcilla (broad beans with black pudding) from the Moro Cookbook.

Okay, I digress, but in an ideal world my final meal would be huevos rancheros to start, then habas con morcilla, followed by Yauatcha's violetta or voilet and blackcurrent mousse cake. Okay, so they may not sit well together but individually I love these three dishes the best.

For mains, I had beef, pork and pine nut meatballs with mash potatoes and a spicy plum chutney. M had braised lamb shank with pomegranates.

We were so stuffed, we could only share the lightest of desserts: summer mixed berries steeped in vodka and served with creme fraiche. It was so sublime and fresh, we want to make it this weekend.

And, of course, the drinks: shots of Zubrówka and the Jagermeister-like Orzechowa or walnut vodka. A long cocktail of Jarzebiak, fresh mint, lime and soda. And a vodka martini with lemon and mint.

And now it's the three-day weekend!

Friday notes:

• What's happened to the weather? It was so cold last night that I seriously considered switching the heating back on. This morning I wrapped up in a scarf but by the afternoon it was sunny and hot.
  
  
• A perennially single friend of mine remarked on how odd she found it seeing couples who rarely talk during a meal out. She found it a sad reflection on their relationships. I accused her (nicely of course) of having made not just a judgmental but a sweeping statement. Granted, some of those couples may need to shake themselves up a little, but not necessarily all of them.
  
  I'm a natural introvert and perhaps as a consequence of being an only child and spending alot of time alone (and single) I really enjoy being quiet and reflective even in the company of people. I'm much more chatty and ebullient in business situations but only because I have to be. I've been with M for just over two years. He has a quick and curious mind and always has something to chat about. I have a lot of things whizzing or slow burning through my mind, but I don't always share those thoughts.
  
  When we were dating and getting to know one another I made an enormous effort to engage verbally with him. It was exciting but the introvert in me also found it a little stressful. Then gradually as I became more secure in his feelings for me and my feelings for him, that effort didn't feel like such an effort any longer. We can spend a dinner chatting away with each other, or we can spend a dinner being quiet in our own thoughts. Sometimes we happily read during dinner at home. We talk when we want to talk. It's simply down to personality.
  
  
• A blogger I read has started a creative non-fiction writing class at London's very popular City Lit. The great thing about a writing class for me is the discipline it forces on you. You are accountable to all the people in the class so you can't make any excuses. I've written two novels and had enough discipline to write them on my own, getting up early in the morning or writing late at night. But that was several years ago and I'm finding discipline (due to exhaustion) a little harder to find. Perhaps a class - not one geared up to writing fiction - but simply a writing class to get me dreaming and composing again - to get that pen pushing across paper.
  
  
• I used to live and teach at a boys' boarding school in the Himalayas and one of my most treasured memories is of watching little boys chasing glowing blue fireflies in the dark and trying to capture them in jars. The delight on their faces will stay with me forever.
  
  
• M's got a 19% pay rise effective immediately. Yippee!

Energy notes

Thank goodness for Google Notes. My notes from the past few days, in reverse chronological order as usual...

• M's back late tonight from France. Hurrah! All I had energy for tonight after work was to watch repeats of Location, Location, Location and flip through Red, Marie Claire and Easy Living. When M's around, we're busy cooking, chatting, simply hanging out with each other. When he's not, I become a bit of a vegetative slob after work. Which ain't such a bad thing, really.
  
• I love the fact that it's very difficult to burn food in a Le Creuset saucepan.
• Also saw Alan Dale (Bradford Meade in Ugly Betty, Caleb Nichol in The OC and Jim Robinson in Neighbours) today.
• Just seen Dom Joly on Berners Street.
• We have absolutely nothing planned for the long weekend, bliss. No doubt we will find things to fill it up with though, bliss. For now I'm getting through the day simply dreaming about a 3-day weekend. And in two weeks we go to NYC! Yeehah!
• Did I mention, I'm exhausted?!
• M's back in France for a couple of days. All I've had the energy for after work while he's been away is watch cheesy chick flicks - Nina's Heavenly Delights, set in an Indian restaurant in Glasgow, about an Indian girl falling in love with her female Scottish business partner; and Jennifer Aniston's The Break-Up (what on earth did they see in each other - both as actors and as characters?!). I cried through both of them, but only had myself to be embarrassed in front of thank goodness. Anyway, crying sometimes feels rather good - clears the cobwebs out.
  
• All I've had the energy for is defrost and reheat leftovers - spag bol and chilli con carne. I am exhausted! Roll on the long Bank Holiday weekend!
• I'm working on 11 new business proposals for existing clients and they all need to be in soon - argh!
• Today I have a breakfast meeting with the CEO of our company, who's flown in from the US - not just myself alone with him of course - now that would be very scary!
• I made the same recipe for Moroccan meatballs in a pomegranate and tomato sauce as before except this time I added finely chopped dried apricots and pine nuts to the meatball mixture - it was heavenly. We finished just in time for me to catch my The OC replacement What About Brian, for M to surf the interweb and then for both of us to catch the penalty shootout between Liverpool and Chelsea.
• I saw Peter Stringfellow walking down Wardour Street looking like a weary, middle aged housewife from the suburbs.
• Ipodifier
  
• What do 300 calorie meals look like?
  
• I work all day with computers. Away from work I still spend a fair bit of time online, but still I love reconnecting with physicality... with the body (moving around, being active), with touch (a crisp newspaper, squishy fruit, my husband's flesh), with taste (savouring every mouthful), with breath (breathing in and out and simply being still and aware)...
• Got chatting to a lovely old man in his eighties today on a packed bus coming home down the hill from the Tube station. I opened up the lines of communication between us asking him if he was okay clinging on to the railing and should I ask someone to move out of their seat. He opened up the lines of communication by saying, No he likes to stand, then looking out at the park and saying, Look how lovely the sun looks shining on the grass. He then proceeded to tell me about his 7 children, his life in Trinidad, his 10 grandchildren - the 10th appearing in this world just yesterday - his early years as a homeless man newly arrived in London, how now he could never leave London even though his children all live in the country because London has been good to him: "I married here, I had children here, I've worked well here"... I was sorry to say goodbye to him.
• I used to get Sunday's New York Times from a newsagents on Old Compton Street but for many months now I've been unable to find it there. However, I finally found a stockist on Wardour Street - the US cover price is only $5 but this newsagent is selling it for £7 - a rip off! I shall nonetheless buy it often because it's simply a brilliant Sunday rag full of interesting articles. I'm a mug.
• London Friday Cities
  

Friday notes

Random notes from my day, in reverse chronological order.

• Logging out now, have a good weekend!
• We were going to go to the New York Fashion Now exhibition at the V&A tonight, followed by dinner at Polish restaurant Wodka. But I'm not feeling very well so it's a night in with a light supper of spaghetti tossed with basil leaves, olive oil, garlic, cherry tomatoes, freshly ground black pepper and freshly grated parmesan cheese. Then one of the DVDs I bought recently - Tony Takitani perhaps, or Performance, Crash or Munich.
• In my team there is a a guy from Philadelphia, a woman from Chicago, a woman from Germany, a guy from Holland, a guy from Scotland and three of us who are English.
• I'm annoyed! I had a lovely wander through Soho again during lunch and picked up a whopper of a beef burrito at Beach Burrito Cafe on Brewer Street. My colleagues eat these all the time and I'd never had one. I was happily eating at my desk and was already planning on throwing alot of it away because it is so damn filling. Then the colleague who sits next to me - a Dutch man not known for his tact - said, "You're gonna eat all of that? My God!" He then outlined an hourglass figure with his hands and said, "Oh, it's okay though cause you're married!" First, it's shocking he can say that to any woman (no wonder he's eternally single) and second, the implication that I no longer need to think about my figure now I'm married is blatantly wrong. I ignored the silly man, but from then on I was conscious of every mouthful.
• It was the New Look store next to M&S on Oxford Street that was ablaze last night. Half of Oxford Street was still closed this morning as there is still the fear the building could collapse. Luckily no casualties have been reported. The street is eerily quiet with no buses or cars on it.
• I'm preparing for my annual review. One of the questions is What are your four biggest goals for this year? I've found the best way of answering this question is to think of the four things I'm most nervous about doing. In my experience, these tend to be the things I need to do the most.
• Glimpse is a brilliant site - a search engine for clothes and accessories that functions like an online store, complete with thumbnails of each item. Wish there was a British version.
  
• I wonder what would happen if I didn't switch on a computer for the entire duration of this weekend? How would I feel? What would change? What would I do? What would happen if I extended that experiment into my weekday evenings - not turning on the computer after and before work - for a day, for a week? I'd certainly miss recording my activities, but what if I only blogged on my site and didn't look at any others? Thought inspired by this blog entry.
  

Midweek rambles

More random words from my Google Notes so far this week. It's quite interesting keeping track of my thoughts and activities in bite-size form throughout the working day. I blog so little about my everyday working life and the silly, mundane thoughts that rise to the surface. Now it's pretty easy.

Today...

• The thought that M's cooking sea bream on rice with Japanese pickled vegetables tonight, which he marinated last night, is making me itch for it to be dinner time already.
• Rushing to finish off a hosting proposal so I can chair the brainstorm meeting with creatives in half an hour.
• Those London free newspaper guys need to be shot - they get in my way, they make me trip over the disgarded newspapers, and they can't take no for an answer!
• I'll be definitely checking some of these out in NYC next month (have already been to the excellent Azul Bistro).
  
• Walking around Soho at lunchtime is a lovely thing to do. The streets are not packed and I can indulge in a few rosie apples hard candy from the quaint Mrs Kibble's Olde Sweet Shoppe on Brewer Street.
• Why do some men ruin the look of their perfectly nice suit by wearing the trousers so short in the leg? I do not want to see even a hint of sock as you walk, mister - you look like a schoolboy! And while you're at it, note that the wet look hair gel you use makes you look like you're ten years old. Oh yes, and polish those shoes for God's sake - why, why?
• Today, I mustn't be deceived by the weather again. Yesterday, the morning was cool and grey so I wore my favourite Nicole Farhi sweater. By the end of the day, I was baking and felt like a frump. So today, the sky is grey and the breeze is cool but I will not be stumped. I'm wearing my pretty little Oasis blouse. I bet it freezes up today...
• Remember to book Wodka in Kensington for dinner.
• Lunch today is rocket and spinach salad with cherry tomatoes, stuffed vine leaves, a sprinkle of mixed seeds, raisins and dried cranberries and a little Turkish sheeps cheese.

Yesterday...

• Marc Jacobs - very nice.
• Joi Ito's going very Zen these days. I like it.
• A senior colleague said to me this morning, "For someone who looks so lovely and sweet, you have a ruthless business brain." I'm hoping this was a compliment!
• Yey, Handbrake DVD-to-iPod converter is now available for Windows.
  
• I've got another headache - aargh!
• When I first got my new work laptop I got headaches and eye strain peering at my new 1680 x 1050 pixel screen resolution. It's amazing and a little scary how soon the eyes get used to it.
• Derek Lam's collection looks fabulous. I can't afford it, but this girl will be drooling as I window shop my way around NYC next month.
• McDonald's to team up with the Vegetarian Society seeking accreditation for a range of vegetarian-compliant products, including a strawberry milkshake and a burger - what?!
• Why do people dawdle by Tube entrances getting in the way of the stream of people on their way to work?!
• For all my excitement and, I admit it, smugness about being married, there's a part of me that sometimes feels ultra conventional and a little past it now...
• Remember olive oil and Turkish bread for dinner tonight.
• Rye bread, cherry tomatoes, Napolina salami slices and Turkish sheep cheese for lunch today.
• I am annoyed. Why can't people talk to each other to resolve an issue. Picking up the phone is so much more effective than endless rounds of emails cc'ing all and sundry!

Day before yesterday....

• Logging off, over and out.
• Can't believe the day went by without a single meeting - a miracle.
• Proof-reading a document for one of our big charity clients - attention to detail is critical.
• The day has gone by so quickly. Off home to cook chicken jalfrezi for me and M, using chicken leftover from last night's roast dinner. Will fry chicken, onions, garlic and ginger with dried cumin, coriander and turmeric and some dried red chillis, then slosh it all around with fresh tomatoes. Yum!
• Sorting out a few things that the client has messed up on a site we built for them.
• Sorting out client invoicing.
• Walking in heels all day does wonders for the legs - beats the gym at least!
• Okay, lunch over, back to work!
• I actually like the sound of blogger ChubbyHubby's favourite comfort food: beef bovril, mixed with steamed rice and butter, topped with a fried egg. "I used to eat this as a child and still love the flavors today." Courtesy of the always excellent and very addictive Serious Eats site.
• Have to make it here: http://www.whitney.org.
• Tacita Dean at the Guggenheim.
  
• Art in NYC.
  
• More art in NYC links.
  
• Need to visit here when we go to NYC next month.
  
• Currently reading about quick repsonse codes, geotagging, tag clouds, news maps, behavioural targeting, vlogging, mobile media on demand and more - very interesting stuff - no, seriously! Have I mentioned before that I love my job!
• India is considering reducing the amount of time it takes a foreigner to adopt an Indian child from a year to 45 days. This is very, very, very good news and one I am keeping tabs on.
• Must remember to pop into an Orange store to look for a basic, easy-to-use, big buttoned mobile phone for my dad. The clerks keep wanting to sell him the latest sophisticated all-singing, all-ringing mobile gizmo but all he wants is something to receive and make calls - he doesn't even text and certainly doesn't need photo and MP3 functionality.
• My lunch today: roast chicken pieces and tabbouleh left over from last night's dinner, enriched with dried cranberries and raisins and mixed seeds, plus a few pieces of Turkish sheep cheese. Lovely!
• I dread opening my work emails on a Monday morning usually. But this morning it is fine - only 45 emails and most of it company-wide mail. All is well - projects I'm managing are all in hand - most unusual and I mustn't speak too soon. It means, though, that I can focus on new business research today - thank God for good project managers.
• Another lovely, warm day. I love it now I can wear my sleeveless tops. Still not warm enough to wear my floaty short skirts, but soon, soon...

Random notes

I've got Google Notebook set up on my work and home computers so I can keep track of things seamlessly and frequently. Whenever I want to make a note of a URL or a thought or a reminder or an observation, I simply click the Open Notebook button in the corner of my browser status bar and note away. They're not very coherent, unfortunately contain a lot of exclamation marks and, like a blog, they're in reverse chronological order, but here are my unedited Friday notes before I log off for the day and go and meet my husband:

• Dandy Yankie on the department iPod speakers for a fitting end to the work end!
• I love Google Notebook.
• It's Friday!!!!!
• Another hot date with my husband tonight - dinner and a movie, how quaint.
• I love my job! (Just in case keystroke logging software's been installed on my company's servers!)
• Those lovely summer smocks all the girls are wearing makes it difficult to tell who's pregnant or not on the Tube
• The office feels very quiet - many are off in NYC, others have taken a half day
• The chunky chocolate fudge dessert from EAT was a yummy moment for me today
• It's funny, but most of the time I feel like my head is empty - not in a good, Zen way, but in a vacuous, "I'm so thick" way. This week I've forced myself to remember that I have a PhD, that I must have been brainy to get it, and reminding myself of that has made me more alert and alive. I'm not talking to people self-consciously thinking, "Oh what I'm saying is so thick!"
• This morning the sky is grey but it's okay because the light is still clear and I'm warm inside my cashmere jumper.
• My neighbour has some exquisite white calla lilies in his front garden. He's an elegant old man - Greek perhaps, or maybe even Turkish - and he takes care of his appearance and walks everyday to the shops with his walking cane.
• There's nothing better than walking somewhere and being fully in the body. Usually my head is full but this morning walking to work I was entirely aware of my movements across the streets and was entirely relaxed in my body.
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