Kolkata beef and coconut curry

It's been a while since I posted a recipe here on Planethalder. When it was still fashionable, I thrived on the protein-rich Atkins diet. Beef is my favourite meat and I nearly always choose it if it's on the menu. Steak done rare is my ultimate dish and it is what I ate, with rocket and sun-blush tomatoes dressed with balsamic vinegar and parmesan shavings, at Caffe Caldesi in Marylebone on Friday night after work. This weekend, we visited my parents in Suffolk. One of the wonderful things about visiting my mum and dad is the fantastic, home cooking. On Saturday, my mother cooked us an array of mouth-watering Indian dishes: dal with sultanas and fresh coconut pieces, curried mixed vegetables, plump cod steaks in a spiced coconut and mango sauce, and this dish - Kolkata beef and coconut curry...

Sunflower oil
450g/1lb diced beef
2 medium tomatoes sliced
3 medium sized potatoes diced
1 medium onion thinly sliced
2 cloves garlic crushed
1 tsp cumin seeds
3 tsps coriander seeds
1 tsp black peppercorns
1 tsp crushed red chillies
1 tsp sugar
2.5cm/1in piece fresh ginger peeled and finely chopped
1 tsp tumeric
1 tsp garam masala
Salt to taste
100g/4oz creamed coconut dissolved in half pint hot water
Juice of 1 lemon

1. Heat the oil in a large saucepan, add garlic and onion and fry for 3-5 mins until the onion is golden brown.
2. Crush the cumin, coriander, peppercorns and red chillis in a pestle & mortar and add to the pan. Fry for 2 mins, stirring continuously to blend with the onion mixture.
3. Add ginger, tumeric, garam masala and tomatoes and fry for another minute, stirring well.
4. Add the beef and stir well to coat with the spices. Fry for another 5 mins, stirring well to seal the meat on all sides.
5. Pour in the stock, bring to the boil, then reduce the heat, cover and simmer for 10-15 mins.
6. Stir in diced potatoes, bring to boil and simmer for another 20 minutes, adding more water if necessary.
7. Pour in creamed coconut and lemon juice and stir well. Cover and simmer gently for 40 mins until the meat is tender, stirring occasionally.

Serve with basmati rice.

Happy birthday, Mr Jones

I'm celebrating this guy's birthday today - 61 today. The only celebrity I still obsess about (since I was a child). I know Elvis would have been 73 today, but I don't remember him. It's the leper messiah I grew up with in the 1980s (albeit a decade too late), so Happy Birthday Dame David Bowie - your music and your many different looks have given me untold pleasure over the years.

My personal top three favourite David Bowie albums of all time: Station To Station (1976), Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps) (1980), Heathen (2002).

In and out and about

Thursday turned out to be Indian Treats day for me. During my lunch break, I walked down to Drummond Street near Euston to pick up some paneer for the evening dinner when I passed by Diwani Bhel Poori House and thought, "Why not?" The place was packed due to the restaurant's buffet lunch special but I managed to find a table for one. I had bhel puri, of course, and then malai kofta with paratha. The food was not as tasty as my favourite Ravi Shankar Restaurant next door, but it hit the spot. Then I popped over the road to Ambala for a tub of their very moreish Ambala Mix. And then later, for dinner, I cooked paneer and peas curry.

On Friday, I discovered our company had changed their maternity regulations for the better. Instead of providing just the basic statutory rights, they are offering three months full pay, three months half pay, back to work bonus and all benefits including health, dental, pension and gym membership left intact. Apparently the company decided to make the changes because they didn't want to lose valuable female staff - since just three of us at work will be going on maternity leave soon it left me feeling very chuffed and valuable!

After work, I went out for drinks with colleagues and then met M for dinner at Hong Kong Diner in Chinatown. We ate chicken kung po, beef and spring onions, stir-fried greens and egg fried rice. At home, we ate some Ben & Jerry's vanilla ice cream with some thick dulce de leche poured over the top.

On Saturday, we visited Alicia Dubnyckyj's Two Cities exhibition at Sarah Myerscough Fine Art in Mayfair. Dubnyckyj took snapshot photos during trips to San Francisco and New York City then manipulated them on her computer before painting the images onto MDF with gloss paint. The results were interesting though a little too "paint by numbers" for my liking. We also popped into the Aicon Gallery to view their Winter Moderns exhibition (Jamini Roy, right), but once again nothing jumped out at me and I felt that much of it wouldn't have looked out of place in the wall art sections of Habitat or Ikea. That was my instant reaction anyway. However, with hindsight and longer reflection I realise now that at the time - early 20th century - these modern Indian masters really broke new ground within India in bringing a different artistic aesthetic to public attention. With that in mind, I will try and return to view the works with refreshed eyes.

We lunched on open rye bread sandwiches at the Nordic Bakery - M had pickled herring and I had cheese and pickles, plus the obligatory cinnamon bun. We browsed shirts for M on Jermyn Street but were disappointed with the quality and styles. I think he'll stick to his usual Jil Sander, Dries Van Noten, Martin Margiela and Gieves & Hawkes. Though he may also check out bespoke.

While in town, we also picked up some Korean Sparrow's Tongue and 2nd flush Darjeeling tea from East Teas; black rye bread and smoked Gouda from Fresh & Wild; Medoc and Malbec wines from Milroy's; a Korean cookbook and some Charles Dickens novels from Foyles; an umbrella from Muji; some tofu, daikon and miso paste from Arigato; and some dried macaroni from Lina Stores.

Back at home, M cooked baked macaroni with cheese, bacon and spinach - inspired by our lunch at Automat last weekend - and then we vegged out on the sofa with the weekend papers, books (The Old Curiosity Shop for me and Vikram Chandra's Sacred Games for M), and magazines.

On Sunday, the weather was bright and sunny and crisp with clear blue skies, so we went down to the Southbank and strolled a while along the river, peering into all the strollers as we went along. It seemed there were so many other young, mixed Indian-English couples out and about too with their Indian-English babies. We had fun wondering how ours will turn out - what colour skin tone, what colour hair, will he or she look more Indian or more English, how much hair will she or he have (alot I think, judging from the fact that M and I were both born with masses of thick dark hair).

Then we snuggled into the large, comfy armchairs at the Benugo cafe inside the BFI, for a couple of hours waiting for our movie - Wim Wenders' Alice In The Cities - to start. We lunched on deli sandwiches, thick-cut chips with ketchup and rice pudding with raspberry sauce, chatted, read the papers and people watched. The space at Benugo is great for families with strollers and there were many babies, toddlers and children around which will be terrific for us later on in the year. The Tate Modern members room is the same - great for parents with young children, complete with changing facilities. And the Barbican of course has parents and babies film showings most weekends. I'm beginning to file it all away!

The film was excellent - shot in grainy black and white, the film follows a blocked reporter who ends up on the road - travelling across America and Holland - with a nine year old girl in search of her mother who has deserted her.

Then back home, where M cooked a spicy lamb bhuna with crushed fennel, fenugreek, coriander, cumin and mustard seeds plus crushed dried red chillis, ginger, garlic and tomatoes. His first attempt at cooking a curry for me and it was superlative. When my mother found out she said, "How am I going to cook curries for him from now on?" as she knows how well my husband cooks. Don't worry Ma, I am sure he will gobble up all your delicious curries next weekend when we come visit you. Besides, you have decades more experience of cooking Indian food than him!

He also tried his hand at okra curry (above) and we ate the Indian feast together with his father, sister and sister's friend who came for dinner.

Delicious, M!

New Year notes

• I have so much to be grateful for in 2007 - my husband, our romantic wedding in February, my ever-deepening relationship with my parents, gaining a new family, getting two pay rises and a promotion in a career and company I love, my husband enjoying his new job also, getting pregnant, re-visiting NYC, having two honeymoons in Japan and India, getting our offer on a house accepted, having another year of good health.
  
  
• My life has not always been so blessed and joyous, and I know enough about how life works to not expect such blessings and joys so fulsomely all the time. But this was certainly my year for happiness and I am savouring it all.
  
  
• I suspect 2008 will be just as busy and so I am again not making any New Year resolutions. When I recovered from cancer a few years ago, I vowed I would make the most of life and not just seize opportunities as they came to me but create opportunities for myself, without thinking too much and over-analysing and having the moment pass me by. It was the biggest resolution I could make to myself and has served me increasingly well over the years.
  
  
• Having said all that, there are a few bite-sized resolutions I want to keep for 2008. I am guilty of never having read a Charles Dickens novel and as I love London so much I want to rectify this pronto. I want to get back into the habit of reading the current affairs sections of newspapers and magazines rather than contenting myself with the Arts or Lifestyle sections. I want to keep in better touch with family and friends - even if it simply means remembering to send birthday cards out on time. I want to make sure I slather on the body lotion each and every morning after my shower.
  
  
• We saw the New Year in quietly at home, with a leg of lamb slow-roasted with rosemary and garlic and served with a salad of baby lettuces, sliced pears, orange segments, coriander leaves, pomegranate seeds, toasted pine nuts and roasted beetroot. M found the salad recipe in a local Austin newspaper from his business trip to Texas a few weeks ago. Then we watched Jools Holland on BBC2 and the sensational fireworks on the River Thames on BBC1 and soon after midnight phoned both sets of families - one in Suffolk, the other in Loughborough - to wish them a Happy New Year.
  
  
• This may very well, God willing, be our last New Year together before we are joined by Little Planethalder so it was extra special seeing in 2008 just the two of us - M with his California syrah and me with my elderflower cordial. Hugging, kissing, being in love, being together.
  
  
• And then today, the first day of 2008, we went walking across Hampstead Heath, where we were married earlier this - whoops, last year. One of my favourite places on earth and so close to home. Our boots sinking into the wet, squelching mud. Stopping for bangers and colcannon mash and bread pudding for lunch at Kenwood House.
  
  
• At home, we began to watch Akira Kurosawa's medieval epic Kagemusha, but were so shattered from the walk and fresh air we collapsed into sleep.
  
  
• Now M is preparing shepherd's pie from the lamb leftover from last night's roast and reading last weekend's New York Times and I'm catching up online.Tomorrow, it's back to work for both of us. Happy New Year one and all!
  

Saturday shopping, Sunday lazing

We've spent the last few days of 2007 flexing our credit cards - M at Maison Martin Margiela and Gieves & Hawkes, myself at DKNY and John Smedley. My usual wardrobe consists of my favourite clothing colours black and white and indigo and charcoal, but pregnancy hormones are drawing me towards a different colour spectrum. I had already bought a vibrant, metallic grey dress and burgundy pink sequin camisole from DKNY for my work Christmas party a week ago, and yesterday I bought clothing in champagne and plum and electric blue. These are the colours that are exciting me now.

We strolled through Hyde Park in the brilliant sunshine and popped into the disorientating Anthony McCall light show in the Serpentine. We cabbed it to Dover Street for macaroni cheese and apple pie at the fabulous Automat American brasserie, before wandering around the quirky and wonderful collections at Dover Street Market.

As evening fell, we made it to Tottenham Court Road and bought a 250 GB Sony HDD and DVD recorder. We then spent the rest of the night at home setting it up and playing around with it, not even bothering to cook - instead we dined on cheese and crackers, clementines and chocolate.

The cheese gave us both nightmares. M's dream revolved around Elton John (don't ask); my own anxious dream was about leaving my newborn baby hungry and dirty all night because I didn't know how to breast feed it or change its nappy. Bizarrely, I also dreamed of Mick Jagger and David Bowie floating contentedly down a canal through busy high street Peckham, surrounded by unconcerned shoppers, and ordering takeout curry from a man in Islamic clothing who waded out into the water to serve them in their gondola.

Now it's nearly lunchtime on a Sunday. We started the day with bulging bacon and tomato ketchup sandwiches, then I spent the morning reading the feel-good novel Big Cherry Holler by Adriana Trigiani while M went to the gym. I'm still playing around with the HDD recorder. I'm editing Match Of The Day M recorded last night so we can keep just the Arsenal v. Everton match highlights. I'm editing out the adverts from the Badlands movie we also recorded. And I've put Kiki's Delivery Service on the timer to record while we go out grocery shopping later.

Later tonight, I will cook a hearty beef chilli con carne and we'll eat it with tacos and guacamole. M is planning to make a New York cheesecake. He made a fabulous puff pastry pie with the leftover Christmas goose (above) after Boxing Day. For New Year's Eve and New Year's Day, we will roast a leg of lamb and then serve the remains up in a sheperd's pie.

Hope you're having a good weekend.

Christmas lists

Food we ate...

My wonderful husband cooked the main Christmas Day meal: Roasted Gressingham goose stuffed with whole oranges / potatoes roasted in goose fat / homemade apple sauce / homemade chesnut stuffing / red cabbage with juniper berries / brussels sprouts / black forest gateau from Paul on Old Compton Street / steamed Christmas pudding / cardamom wafer and rose and violet cream chocolates from Liberty / clementines / Shropshire blue, Wensleydale, Double Gloucester and soft goats cheeses with assorted crackers / lots of expensive French red wine, and elderflower cordial for me / beef steaks with fries and a tomato salad on Christmas Eve / whole salmon with French beans, new potatoes, citrus and fennel salad and dill sauce on Boxing Day


Gifts we received...

M: Band Of Brothers DVD box set / Berlin Alexanderplatz DVD box set / vintage hand trowel and fork gardening set / crystal liquor glasses / Malin & Goetz grooming products / Book tokens / pottery
Me: The L Word DVD box set / Satyajit Ray's Abhijan DVD / a cashmere wrap / a National Geographic world atlas / book tokens / Nigella Express cookbook / The Rough Guide To Pregnancy And Birth book / pottery / the incredibly useful reference tome Harden's London Baby Guide

Christmas TV and movies we watched...

Peter And The Wolf / The Snowman, with the original David Bowie introduction / The Simpsons / The Polar Express / Only Fools And Horses / To The Manor Born

Who I missed the most...

My parents. I can't wait to see them again in the New Year.

The weekend

I had intended for the weekend to be a chilled affair in the run up to Christmas but I should have known better.

Friday night, shopping for maternity wear at Top Shop, Benetton and M&S and then meeting up with my husband, who had just returned from the States, for a Korean dinner at Bi-won on Coptic Street.

Saturday, schlepping around central London and battling against the heaving crowds for last minute Christmas gifts - a Casio Exilim camera for a little boy, a 2008 "dear diary", a computer game and a DVD box set for a little girl, wrapping paper and cards from the wonderful treasure trove that is Paperchase on Tottenham Court Road. M still has a bit more shopping to do (my presents I suspect!) but he has Christmas Eve off work. We ate a late lunch of rose apple and chicken stir fry and jungle curry at Busaba Eathai on Wardour Street, then popped into Paul bakery on Old Compton Street to order a black forest gateaux for Christmas. Last minute Christmas food shopping at John Lewis then a much deserved cab home. By this time my back was aching and I was feeling quite uncomfortable - I had to unbutton my (non-maternity) jeans in the taxi. Once home, M cooked us a roast chicken with roast potatoes and wilted spinach and then we settled in to watch Spiderman 3 on DVD.

Sunday, heading to the Southbank to revisit the sensational Painting Of Modern Life at the Hayward, which examines the use and translation of photographic imagery in contemporary painting, and Louise Bourgeois at the Tate Modern. At the Tate, we were transfixed by the delight of a little toddler waddling with squealing joy towards each Bourgeois piece with her arms outstretched. Obviously in thrall of the different shapes and textures, the toddler's excitement was a refreshing counterpart to the artist's own depiction of childhood angst. We stopped for a comfort lunch of chunky handcut chips at Benugo and then a look at Patrick Keiller's The City Of The Future installation/compilation of film footage from London to Shanghai from the years 1896-1909.

On the way home, we stopped off for more groceries for Christmas and then while M cooked us a dinner of Mexican chilli and chicken "lasagne" (made with tortilla layers instead of pasta), I vegged out with uplifting chick flick The Holiday with Kate Winslet and Cameron Diaz. After dinner, we both settled in to watch the disappointing Robert Downey Jr movie A Guide To Recognizing Your Saints.

And now to bed, as I have work tomorrow. Christmas for me will begin from tomorrow evening. Hurrah! Although then I'm back at work on Thursday and Friday. Our wedding, two honeymoons - to India and Japan - and then a trip to New York have used up all my holiday allowance for this year.

Uh-oh...

... I've discovered Celebrity Baby Blog and Baby Razzi and am now addicted. Did you know Britney Spear's 16 year old sister is pregnant? And so is Lily Allen. Okay, so you all knew. I've not been keeping up with the gossip, I admit it!

Better tear myself away from the computer and go out and finish up my Christmas shopping! M's just returned from a work trip to the US so we met up last night for a Korean meal at Bi-won on Coptic Street. I was laden down with maternity clothes from Top Shop, Benetton and M&S as at 17 weeks many of my existing clothes are on the tight and uncomfortable side (and I no longer want to stretch my designer clothes). This weekend, we're going to try and take it easy. Christmas shopping today in town and then home to cook a roast chicken and watch Spiderman 3 on DVD.

I'm working on Christmas Eve but then my mother-in-law and sister-in-law will join us for Christmas itself at our place. M is cooking roast goose with red cabbage plus chestnut and apple stuffing, which I am really looking forward to as I've never eaten goose before.

Have a lovely Christmas all!

Bump or frump

Last week I bought a luxe metallic grey dress and burgundy sequin camisole to wear for the upcoming work Christmas party. I always find DKNY dresses very roomy so I didn't feel the need to buy maternity. However, wearing it made my still easily-disguisable but growing bump look huge. There was no way work wouldn't guess I was pregnant. So the dress became the deciding factor in telling my colleagues that I was pregnant.

I told my immediate boss a few days ago and then a few colleagues, and slowly word trickled out. The company is 150+ though so many people still do not know. That was why I was extremely nervous about the party last night.

Some of us girls traipsed excitedly off to the Virgin Active gym across the road to get changed as there is more space there and lots of all important mirrors, hair dryers and plug sockets for straighteners. There, I pulled my dress on and immediately panicked. I've never been pregnant before and have never had a bump and here I was looking blatantly pregnant in a dress whose shiny metallic fabric glinted under lights and bounced off every curve.

The girls reassured me that I looked fabulously pregnant rather than frumpishly fat. But even looking pregnant made me anxious as it's such a dramatic change to my body and I'm simply not used to it.

I spent the first hour or so at the party feeling very conspicuous. But as the night progressed, I began to feel more and more comfortable about the bump being on show. Last night must have been a real milestone because today is a new day and I feel I can wear a tighter ti-shirt and not try and hide the bump away under layers. Hurrah!

Being publicly pregnant takes some getting used to.

16 weeks + 5 days

Allow me to introduce...

... Little Planethalder. Now officially 16 weeks and 4 days.

Squint and you'll be able to see him or her a little clearer in all that fuzz.

A few lovely things

... Spending the weekend with my parents in Suffolk and eating lots of cake in celebration of both my mother's and my husband's birthdays
... Watching the glee on M's face as he flicked through the leatherbound edition of Arsenal newspaper cuttings from the last 80 years or so that I got him, amongst other things, for his birthday
... Cooking and eating okra curry with red peppers and black mustard seeds on a cold, wintry night
... Buying a metalic silver dress and sequin burgundy vest from DKNY for our work Christmas party. Just need to buy the push up bra, heels and a new pair of Wolford tights and I'm set
... Wining and dining clients on expenses
... Getting a promotion at work today and my second pay rise of the year - yippeeee!

The house

Here are photos of the Victorian house in North London we are buying... Not our type of decor but we can always change this in good time.

The living room... The front of the living room will be where we relax together and with friends and family. We want to make the back part of the lounge a library, with wall to wall books and a comfy reading chair and tall reading lamp. There is a French door at the back which looks out onto the side of the house - we want to make this strip into a Zen garden of sorts so we can read and look out and be at peace.

The kitchen... We anticipate spending alot of time here. Our current kitchen is so small we've always been reluctant entertaining - perferring to eat out. But this kitchen is big and cosy at the same time and the vendor is leaving his lovely high-tech cooker behind. Finally, space to display all our cookbooks.

The bathroom... Um, may have to paint this all white and tile it but it's fine for immediate use.

The upstairs hallway looking out to the bathroom and then the back bedroom... The whole house is in need of a fresh lick of white paint to lift the place and make it bright and airy. There's a double bedroom to the left and the master bedroom behind. The loft is above and big enough to make another double bedroom or a roomy study if we wish...

The garden with well-established trees and shrubs. M is already looking at gardening books in the bookstores so he can grow vegetables. We would also like to have an apple tree and another fruit tree planted... Or perhaps a "garden studio".

The back of the house... Can you see the space along the side where we want to make a calming Zen space?

I'm so terribly impatient to move into our very own home. For the first time in my life, I've made some rather (wonderfully) conventional choices this year - I got married, I'm about to buy a house... What next I wonder?

Cold and rainy days and nights

Random notes from the last week or so: Lusty and disturbing George Baselitz at the Royal Academy / Takeaway fish and chips slathered in vinegar, salt and ketchup / Enjoyable if conventional Brick Lane at the Curzon Soho / Moreish sausage rolls at Konditor & Cook in the Curzon / Huge cheesecakes at Patisserie Valerie on Old Compton Street / One of my favourite comfort dishes of all time, dolsot bibimbap, and other Korean delights, at Bi-Won on Coptic Street / Old romantic movies on cold rainy weeknights - The Philadelphia Story with Cary Grant, James Stewart and Katharine Hepburn, and Indiscreet with Cary Grant and Ingrid Bergman - while my husband is away on business in Paris / Finishing the absorbing and characterful novel Digging To America by Anne Tyler and starting Kiran Desai's exquisitely written The Inheritance Of Loss / The comprehensive Breaking The Rules exhibition at the British Library on avant garde printing traditions in Europe between 1900 and 1937 / Long, tiring but exhilerating working days as clients rush to launch things before the Christmas and the New Year / Gearing up for the work party season with colleagues and clients / More comfort eating - huge portions of cheesy tacos from Mexicali and baked potatoes with chilli cheese or baked beans and cheese from Spud-U-Like for weekday lunches / Sheltering from the downpour after work with beef rendang and other Indonesian and Malaysian delights at Melati on Peter Street / Happy that my Virgin Active gym membership now entitles me to use any branch in London - now I just need to motivate myself to go more often / Still waiting for all the paperwork to be tied up, but meeting the vendor of our new house and learning how the heating works / Eve Arnold's beautifully evocative and epic photos from China in 1979 at Asia House / Filling and spicy lamb kebabs, bhel puri and vegetable samosas at Asia House's elegant little Cafe T / This weekend's viewing: the gorgeously filmed Seven Years In Tibet last night and later this afternoon perhaps we'll watch John Huston's classic Moby Dick on DVD / Bowls overflowing with blueberries, peaches and clementines / Roast chicken for Sunday dinner later tonight.

Silence

Just popping in to say I'm still here. So much is happening and I'll write soon, I promise.

Busy doing nothing

A very quiet weekend this week. On Friday, samosas, chicken chaat, tamarind lamb and chicken and pomegranate at The Punjab in Covent Garden / On Saturday, a wander around John Lewis looking at LCD TVs and desktop computers /Getting my hair done and generally being gloriously pampered for several hours at the Aveda Institute on High Holborn / Eating ricotta and pumpkin ravioli, from Lina Stores in Soho, for a quiet dinner at home / On Sunday, a lie in as our downstairs neighbours had a rowdy night (as usual) and kept us awake - can't wait to move into a whole house all our own / Hanging out with my mother-in-law and sister-in-law at home /Eating spinach borek and tomato, feta and thyme salad and clementines for lunch / Later we will devour M's homemade venison and beetroot stew for dinner / Afterwards, more chatting and maybe a DVD.

Hope you've had a chilled weekend too.

The only one

Silent One wrote an interesting post on second children that made me think about my own situation. I'm an only child and, as far as I can remember, had no problems growing up alone at all. It was a normal situation for me. Because both my parents worked full time, I had a variety of baby sitters and went to nursery school very early and as a result I was quite bubbly and sociable and never shy. I had my parents' undivided attention during evenings and weekends, and I was included whenever their adult friends visited. And of course I had my nursery, primary and secondary school friends too.

I was also very content to be on my own. I had an active imagination and could while away many hours alone in my own world. I loved reading as much as playing, and my mum says today that frequently she would not hear me for hours even if we were in the same house! In short, I think I was a very well-adjusted only child.

It was only as an adult, and no longer cushioned from life by my parents, that I began wondering what it would be like to have a sibling or two to share the ups and downs of life with. I know relationships with siblings are not guaranteed to be smooth nor are many of them that close, but the unspoken bond based on shared history and biology is something I sometimes wish I had for myself now.

M is really close to his siblings. He doesn't see them often, but when they get together their pleasure at seeing one another and their natural, unguarded interaction is a delight to witness.

And my father comes from a large family. Because all his siblings are in India, he sees them extremely infrequently. Years go by. But when they finally see one another, their genetic and social history binds them together in such a way that the fact that years have passed means nothing. Again, it's a joy to watch.

I am extremely close to my parents and so the need for a familial bond is satisfied. Moreover, I am married now and am creating my own family unit with M. But when my parents are no longer here? ... If I didn't have M in my life, if I was truly alone, I wonder how much "existential" loneliness I would feel - perhaps a fair bit...

All this, for some reason, doesn't make me want to necessarily have more than one child. But then again, who knows...

Ashes to ashes

Saturday began with signing yet more papers at our estate agents. We were due to get the survey from The Woolwich last week; when we didn't, our estate agent called them and were told that they were battling a huge backlog of work and we were in a queue of three weeks. We instructed our agent to switch to Cheltenham & Gloucester who assured us they would take just one week. Everyone on the upward chain is keen to move as they now have their surveys sorted. Once the survey comes through, and providing it is fine, then exchanging contracts should be straight forward and we could move in before Christmas. The waiting game is nerve-wracking, especially for an impatient girl as myself.

Afterwards, we took the Tube to Sloane Square to visit the Eyes Of An Island - Japanese Photography 1945 - 2007 exhibition at the Michael Hoppen Gallery. The show wasn't as comprehensive, nor as dazzling as the blockbuster survey of Japanese photography we saw at the Tokyo Metropolitan Museum Of Photography last month (which I promise one day I will write about), but it was a good show for London as exposure to Japanese photography is still nascent here. Photographers on show were Shomei Tomatsu, Daido Moriyama, Hiroshi Hamaya, Shigeichi Nagano, Hiromi Tsuchida, Eikoh Hosoe, the sublime Hiroshi Sugimoto (above), Ryuji Miyamoto, Naoya Hatakeyama and Nobuyoshi Araki.

Fancying some Lebanese food for lunch, we tried to get into the terrific Al-Dar on the Kings Road, but as usual it was packed out so as we were heading back into town we got off at Green Park and went into the Beiteddine Express on Clarges Street in Mayfair. There we lunched on lamb shawarma and selection of vegetarian mezze - battara harra (cubes of potatoes fried with garlic and coriander), vine leaves (stuffed with rice, parsley, chick peas, mint, lemon juice and olive oil), tabbouleh (parsley, tomatoes, lemon juice, mint, crushed wheat and olive oil), baba ghanouj (grilled aubergines with sesame oil, lemon juice), houmous, and bamia bizeit (okra cooked with tomatoes, onion, garlic and oil). The lamb was very good, but the vegetable dishes, though tasty, were too salty and oily for me.

We tried to get into the Lonely Prophets - German Art From 1910 To The 1930s exhibition at Agnew's on Old Bond Street but as is usual at these tiny dealer galleries, it was shut despite supposedly being open. I vented my frustration with a wander around DKNY instead!

All was forgotten by the time we entered into the Haunch of Venison and the gentle aroma of ashy temple incense suffused and calmed our bodies. Zhang Huan's Ash exhibition, above and below, featured canvasses and sculptures made from the ash remains of incense sticks burnt at temples in Shanghai. From fine dust to coarse flakes, the encrusted and thick impasto pieces were haunting and transcendent. The smells, the intimations of life and death, the organic matter - all put this work in the lofty realms of Anselm Kiefer and Joseph Beuys. Most striking was the slumbering, hulking, 5 metre high Smoking Buddha statue on the top floor - made entirely of ash, encrusted with incense sticks and prayers and other temple artifacts. I truly felt like dropping to my knees in holy and unholy adoration.

"To some, ash seems useless and insubstantial; it is a short-lived witness to human spirituality and spiritual practice. To me, ashes carry unseen sedimentary residue, and tremendous human data about the collective and individual subconscious" - Zhang Huan.

I wish I could urge you to see it; I wish I could see it again. Alas, the show ended yesterday.

We quickly popped into Liberty to stock up on more of my favourite Kiehl's cucumber body cleanser, and into Pages on Shaftesbury Avenue to admire Bodum's cast iron tea pot (left) which I may buy for M for Christmas. I love buying presents that I too can benefit from!. Then we settled in to watch David Cronenberg's riveting, well-paced, chilling and kinetically-violent Eastern Promises, at the Odeon Covent Garden, set in the dark Russian underworld in London. Predictably, the movie has had mixed reviews from the professional critics but I didn't look at my watch once during its 100 minutes and I was swept along by the story. London looked pretty good too in all that rain and darkness.

We picked up some chocolate eclairs from Patisserie Valerie on Old Compton Street then headed home, where M made us beef steaks, fries and a tomato salad for dinner. Snuggling into the sofa with steaming mugs of 2nd flush Darjeeling and the chocolate eclairs, we ended the day watching the companion piece to Eastern Promises, The History Of Violence on DVD, also by Cronenberg, also featuring Viggo Mortensen.

Sunday is, as usual, shaping up to be a quieter affair. A lie in (8.30 for me, 10.30 for M), a leisurely breakfast of eggs on toast, grocery shopping, cleaning the house and doing laundry, then generally taking it easy. I'll finish reading Roopa Farooki's slightly cliched and poorly written but still enjoyable chick lit Bitter Sweets and will indulge in my guilty pleasure of reading Oprah magazine. I say guilty, because it's not a magazine I'd read on the Tube - I always feel a little too young to read a magazine pitched at a middle-aged audience, but article titles such as Love At Last - Just When You Think You've Missed Your Moment, or When The Going Gets Tough... 3 Rules To Pull You Through, or The Two-week Plan That Will Reset Your Body Clock, combined with that relentlessly positive Oprah attitude, get me every time!

Later this afternoon, I may snuggle in for a few episodes of The Waltons on DVD on my own while M is at the gym and then, with him, watch a few episodes of Hill Street Blues on DVD. I may start reading another novel. Which to choose? I love browsing through our book shelves working out which book takes my fancy - the anticipation is sometimes better than the reading. My sister-in-law is coming for dinner tonight and we'll eat roast chicken with pearl barley, walnut and raisin stuffing, chat loads and perhaps watch another movie.

Tomorrow, a friend is staying with us and we'll be gathering with other friends for dinner. What a lovely Monday it should be. I rarely get the Monday morning blues as I'm blessed enough to have work that is still really interesting and sometimes even exciting. But I am sad when the weekend is over because that's my time to do exactly what I want, with no deadlines and no obligations. It's all about me, me, me. Well, and him, him, him ♥.

6.02pm

I never blog about my clients here, but last night was just too exciting to not mention it. Our company worked with Apple and O2 to develop the iPhone for the UK. Developers had been working night and day within a very tight timeline to bring it to life. Last night, at the end of the working day, when most people would usually be in the pub, 50 developers or so plus our two MDs, the client services (including me) and project management teams and the senior client began the countdown to 6.02pm. Then we watched on the console as the first person bought then activated their iPhone - at 6.03! As the minutes ticked by, the console became a hive of Matrix-like activity with sales and activations streaming down the screen. The developers will be there most of the weekend keeping an eye on things.

I finally dragged myself away from the fun to meet M for a lovely Thai dinner at the Thai Garden Cafe on Museum Street. As I walked there to meet him, I spotted three people playing with their iPhones along Oxford Street. We ate green curry with soft shell crab and red curry with beef. Then we popped into the Waitrose in the Brunswick to buy spotted dick with custard for dessert at home.

It's strange as I have no inclination to buy an iPhone right now - I'm waiting for it to go 3G - but last night I kept waking up from dreams of owning an iPhone, playing with it and showing it off to strangers and friends. I've spent over 4 months with this project and I'm delighted the launch went so well.

And even more to celebrate - it's the weekend!

Puttering

Friday night after work is for puttering around the new John Lewis Food Hall, picking at whatever takes our fancy for the weekend ahead - fig bread, Camembert cheese, a variety of pasta, a variety of chocolate, plain and lemon cheesecakes, fresh peas, wild blueberry jam and marmalade - then returning home to cook a moreish dinner of paneer, peas and pumpkin curry.

Saturday is for puttering around town... Lying in very late, reading the newspaper over breakfast with the sun streaming in through the kitchen window, then signing more papers at our estate agents / Strolling down Tottenham Court Road, popping into This Is Furniture, BoConcept and Heal's appraising the merits of different styles of wardrobes, sofas and beds to fill the extra space our new house will have / Eating delicious chargrilled bacon cheeseburgers and fries with garlic mayo at Hamburger Union / Being dazzled by the colour and scale of Shirana Shahbazi's photos and paintings at the Barbican / Crying buckets at the viewing of complex Korean family drama Family Ties by Kim Tae-Yong, also at the Barbican as part of the Korean Film Festival / Walking by the new house and feeling fuzzy, warm and gratified at seeing not just how quiet the area is on a Saturday night and how great the house looks, but by the big, bold Sold sign outside it too / Eating only big bowls of grapes, plums and clementines for dinner while catching up on the thrilling Arsenal v. Man Utd game on Match Of The Day.

Sunday is for puttering around the house... Lying in very late, then breakfasting on toasted crusty white bread with melting slices of smelly Camembert and sweet as can be blueberry jam / Doing laundry / Vacuuming / Dusting / Cleaning floors / Planning the week's dinners - moussaka, tom yun goong, lamb and apricot stew, chickpea and spinach curry - then shopping locally for groceries / Vegging out with creamy Lindt milk chocolate and a chick flick movie Dinner With Friends, not feeling guilty at all while M is sweating it out at the gym / M cooking ahead just as my parents used to do every Sunday - boiling chicken wings into chicken stock for the tom yun goong, slow cooking the tomatoes and grilling the aubergines for the moussaka, part-cooking the lamb for the stew - to save time after work (he gets so much pleasure out of cooking, lucky for me) / Lunching on Heinz tomato soup and crusty white bread with lots of butter melting on top / Eating M's sea bream with fried potatoes and spinach for dinner / Catching up with parents on the phone / Watching old episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm on DVD while eating lemon cheesecakes.

How has your weekend been?

Drawing in

It's been quiet since my last post. Snuggling in is now my favourite activity: work hard all day then come home, cook comfort food - roasted vegetables, Hungarian goulash, spaghetti and tomato sauce - and then settle in with my husband, an interiors magazine and the TV. A lot of early nights - by 9 I'm shattered. I haven't even been bothered to switch on the computer. We spent the weekend with my parents at their home in Norfolk. My mother's knee operation was a success and though her full recovery will take a little more time, she happily fussed over us and cooked us lamb, minced beef and cauliflower curries. I am sure this Saturday will be activity filled: browsing furniture and computers, visiting a gallery or two, perhaps a movie. But I am also sure Sunday will be as chilled as can be. The house purchase is moving along. Many forms have been filled out and signed and posted. We're just waiting for the surveyor's report now. Not much we can do until then. Well, sleeeeep of course...